30 Fun Facts
Since my big 3-0 is coming up and I'm narcissistic enough to write articles entirely about myself—here is a list of 30 fun facts about DJ:
FACT: Along with my older sister, I once microwaved the corpse of a dead toad until it exploded. Our plan was a miracle resurrection. The two of us were made to re-clean the microwave multiple times under parental supervision. The family never used it again.
Follow-up Fact: My Grandpa still thinks this is the funniest thing that has ever happened.
FACT: My favorite colors are black and white. Each time someone points out to me that "black is actually all colors" and "white is the absence of color," I thank them for their contribution to science. I then show them all of the black and white items in my possession before I kick them in the shin.
Follow-up fun fact: In kindergarten, a girl once told me that I didn't know how to color because I used the black crayon too much. I haven't touched a crayon since. (This fun fact is not entirely true.)
Follow-up fun fact #2: I grew up pronouncing "crayon" as "crown". Anybody with me on this? No? Alright.
Follow-up fun fact #3: I also didn't know there was a difference in the pronunciation of "pin" and "pen" until I was 19. I still feel shame about this.
FACT: My eldest sister took me to see a Led Zeppelin laser light show when I was 14. I had never heard Zeppelin before that day and I had only played a few grunge licks on guitar. It changed my life forever.
Follow-up fun fact: Laser light shows now make me sort of queasy.
FACT: I would totally be into being a scientist if there weren't so much math and science involved.
Follow-up fun fact: I really just want the lab coat.
Follow-up fun fact #2: I want a lab coat for my birthday.
FACT: I had a goal to visit all 50 states before age 30. My arbitrary rules stated that drive-throughs counted but airports did not. I made it to the contiguous 48. I have extended the deadline to age 31. Hawaii next week and Alaska this summer.
FACT: My new goal: All 193 recognized countries before death. I'm thinking of counting airports this time.
FACT: Current count: 7 with airports. 6 without.
FACT: As a child, I would occasionally get grounded from watching Cincinnati Reds games because I would get too angry.
FACT: As a child, I would occasionally get grounded from playing Nintendo® because I would get too angry.
FACT: I still have to stop myself from watching sports and playing video games when I start getting too upset.
FACT: Each year, I informally attempt to get myself to like a new food that I previously disliked.
2005- Bell Peppers: YEP
2006- Peas: DONE
2007- Mushrooms: CONQUERED
2008- Asparagus: VANQUISHED
2009- Cucumbers: LOVE THE CUKES
2010- Tomatoes: DOMINATED
2011- Onions: STILL ON THE FENCE BUT IF THEY'RE COOKED, I'M GOOD
2012- I'm thinking eggplant, mussels or zucchini
FACT: I don't like feet.
FACT: Sometimes I sprint away from a basement or a dark place if I'm feeling a little freaked out. Yeah, I'm 30 years old.
FACT: The movie That Thing You Do! had an alarmingly influential role in determining what I wanted to do with my life.
FACT: My first public performance on guitar was the 9th grade talent show in which I played John Lennon's "Imagine" and Led Zeppelin's "Ten Years Gone" with my band GWC.
Follow-up Fun Fact: GWC stood for "Guitars, Women and Cars."
Follow-up Fun Fact #2: After GWC, the bands that I have been in with silly names:
Satellite of Love
Like Buttah (one performance)
Tubb n' Chubb's Fat Funk Fiesta
Brother Big Bad
FACT: I have spent roughly 900 collective hours performing in full cowboy garb. That's over a month if you add it all together.
FACT: My personal record for consecutive hours asleep: 15, when I was 15 years old. And no, I wasn't sick.
FACT: My personal record for consecutive hours awake: 40, when I was 16 years old. And no, I wasn't sick. But I felt like it.
FACT: My personal record for consecutive days without bathing or showering: 4, on tour in the UK when I was 25. The first place that was available was a bath without the option for a shower. It was almost worse than going for 5 days.
FACT: I once ate an entire canister of Planters Cheez Balls in one sitting.
FACT: I floss my teeth every night.
Bonus Fun Fact: I was hoping to be a bit more in shape at 30 (the canister of Cheez Balls probably didn't help with that) and I'll never be good at setting realistic goals for myself. But overall I'm pretty damn thrilled to be where I am at 30 years old. Thank you to all of you for helping me make it this far. Cheers!
Last known photograph
Falkor, The White Dragon
